Day 59: Crack Check

I have been wearing jeans for as long as I can remember, and considering I was born in the early 60's, I've been wearing jeans a LONG, long time.

I've worn every kind of jeans too. 

I wore bell bottoms in the sixties.

I wore "hip huggers" at the turn of that decade, which necessitated the invention of the snap crotch body suit  (true story).

I wore button fly straight legs in the seventies

which, just for the record I HATED that era because I am a bit hippy and straight legs only exaggerated that condition!

who am I kidding? I'm A LOT hippy, and the junk in this trunk has never been a fan of straight leg jeans!  (Fortunately, I'm old enough now that I don't have to wear "skinny" jeans.)


I wore acid washed jeans in the eighties (which by the way is also when holey jeans were the thing and I had a pair of jeans that had such big holes in the knees that my husband hid them from me.  My husband!)

I wore mom jeans in the 90's.

I wore boot cuts at the turn of the century (which were apparently also mom jeans, and I just didn't know it!)

Why all this information about jeans?  Because throughout a lifetime of jeans, I have never had trouble keeping my jeans up!  Is anyone else out there sick of jeans that stretch and stretch and stretch until every movement requires what I call the "crack check?"  What HAPPENED TO JEANS?

I don't care if I buy low cut, high cut, mid rise, sits at waist, sits just above waist, sits just below waist, every pair of jeans I own move into the forbidden land of crack check.

All that to say, I wish someone would invent jeans that actually fit . . . and don't show my . . .