Day 58: The Truth of My Reflection

My grandmother was a very wise woman, and I write about her often.  One of the things she said was, "you should be the kind of woman that if anyone ever said something bad about you, no one would believe them.'"  (That's a paraphrase, but something along those lines.)

Recently a friend of mine said something similar, and it reminded me of my grandmother.
I wonder what she'd be thinking these days.

I believe that I have lived a life that would say to people that I am a woman who loves Jesus, loves her family, loves her friends, and loves people.

But I also know this to be true.  I have not honored people with my words at times.  I have participated in gossip.  I have probably started gossip at times.  I have "vented" my anger, which in reality is often just another form of gossip. 

My list could probably go on.  Yours probably could as well.

And the way we conduct ourselves, the words we speak, the words I speak . . .

those things cause other people to formulate opinions about who we are.

And those opinions can be dangerously easy to believe.  Even if they are wrong.

This morning as I was spending time with the Lord, I wrote this in my journal:

"Lord, more than anything I want to care about truth.  It would be too easy, it IS too easy to care what others say about me.  But what I want to care about is truth.  Help me to see the things in me you want me to refine and let me easily discard all else that consumes my thoughts."

All that to say,  I do want others to see me as a woman who loves God and lives a life that reflects Him.  And the best way for that to happen, is for me to look to Him for how I'm doing.


  1. Carol,
    I don't exactly know how to say this, without being the OPPOSITE of what you are saying in your blog. And I'm not a gifted writer like you.
    I have known you a long time. And I have definitely seen you be snotty and mean, grumpy, snippy, prideful, and downright obnoxious.

    But those are not the things I would say make up your character. Your grandmother would be proud of you. You are a woman who loves God and her family and her friends and others. When I think of you, I DO see Jesus. Just wanted to tell you that. And I know my opinion shouldn't matter! - Ames

  2. Carol,
    Of your Seven (or six) Dwarves listed by Ames above, I think I've only seen Grumpy and Prideful... I didn't even know there was one named "Downright Obnoxious!"
    I'm very proud to be your friend.
    Love you! <3
    ~becky j.

  3. as someone who has know Carol many years and walked thru many seasons of life with this sweet lady... anonymous, you have missed the true joy and fun in knowing the real carol and in "doing" life with her. she is transparent, loving, generous, and giving. she is someone i want to be often i tell people she is like a mentor to me, i think that highly of her. remember i listed transparent first? well she is, the good and the bad...thats what makes Carol real. Can I also add that when she has been ugly or unkind, she has always sought forgiveness, and that my friends is what matters. Carol, I love watching you seek Christ and when you mess up, as we all do, you seek harder....I love that you live what you teach. thanks for being REAL and TRANSPARENT.

  4. Carol - Your gracious response to a critical comment, made anonymously by someone who invokes the classic device of unnamed "others" who supposedly agree, shows that your desire to follow Christ is sincere.

  5. My initial reaction was to get angry at some comments here. Instead, I will follow your lead and be positive instead of focus of neagtives. No one is perfect, acknowledging this and improving is one of your biggest strengths. I believe this is one of the biggest things God wants from us, to try each day to improve ourself and help others. You are loving,supportive and genuine and I love that about you. You inspire me to look at my life and see how I can improve it. I love you and think you rock :)
    -Jamie (your favorite)


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