Day 32: This Surreal Life

Two days ago I was celebrating the engagement of my oldest child to the woman of his dreams.

Last night I was melting down along with my twin two year olds.

At one point, after we had all had a good fit, I said, "Ladies, we are all ladies. And ladies don't scream and ladies don't have fits." :) I needed to hear it too!

Oh, the highs of parenting, the lows of parenting.

Then there's just the funny stuff that makes you shake your head and laugh.

It was bath time. Shortstack was sitting happily in the tub, just playing and singing, but her stubborn sister refused to sit in the tub. She kept telling Mike (who was giving them their baths) "hiney, hiney." He kept saying, "The water isn't hot. Sit down and take a bath."

But there was no convincing her. He had her bend down and feel the water, but she just kept saying "hiney, hiney."

Finally, he said, "Either sit down or I am taking you out of the tub." But she continued to refuse. So, he did in fact, take her out of the tub. Only to discover a little turtling turd hanging from her . . . "hiney, hiney."

So he quickly grabbed her and whisked her to the potty where she successfully finished her business.

In the meantime, Shortstack continued to play in the tub. Now the thing about Shortstack and the bathtub is that she will find and grab and try to eat the tiniest ANYTHING floating in the bathtub. But over time I have trained her to understand that she can't eat these things. And instead, she is to find them and give them to me. (I KNOW you see where this is going . . . !)

So, she says to me, "Here Mimi." I hold out my hand, expecting it to be a hair, or a piece of grass, or some other tiny little thing, and instead she hands me a piece of poop. And not a little piece of poop. Oh no. It's like the size of an egg, and she has firmly compressed it in her little hand. So suddenly, I have a piece of poop in my hand! I scream and drop it (like it's acid or something!) I yank her out of the tub, drain the water, bleach out the bathtub, re-run the bath water, and finally finish bath time.

(I did have a little conversation with Nitro as well, telling her next time to say "poo poo" instead of "hiney." But seriously, I hope there isn't a "next time.")

All that to say, my life is so surreal. From engagement to poop. In one day. Just keeps me humble, you know?