Day 53: A Royal Pain

We are in the midst of potty training, oddly enough a place I never thought I'd be again in my lifetime. Oh the sense of humor the Lord has. :)

In preparation of said potty training, I took the girls shopping for potty chairs and big girl panties. They were very excited about the princesses on their panties and pretty pumped about Minnie Mouse too (though to them all mice are "micka-mouse" . . . including the mouse on the computer!)

The potty chairs that they liked, (mercifully also the cheapest ones!) are pink and purple and when in the open position, they look like a throne. Very appropriate for two little princesses!

The best feature about the chairs is that when the girls "do their business" the potty chairs make a noise. I call it a royal noise because I don't actually know what you would call it. But it's like the sound of a fairy godmother's waving wand or the sound of trumpets blowing a royal fanfare. It's very cute, and it's really nice because I don't have to stand over them WILLING THEM WITH MY LASER VISION to make something happen in that potty chair. Instead, I can go about my business, (not the same "business" as theirs in case you're getting lost) and when I hear the royal noise, I know they have done something, and I can go back into the bathroom.

It's been particularly helpful on those times when they have decided to go potty without telling me they were going. So when I suddenly hear the unexpected "royal sound," I can make a dead run for the bathroom. (I fear they might try to empty the potty on their own as well . . .ewwwww.)


Super awesome singing potty chair. Best idea ever.

. . .


On second thought, maybe not.


2:10 a.m. I hear the fairy godmother wand waving noise and it awakens me from a dead sleep. I think to myself, "Did Shortstack get out of bed, (which by the way is still a crib), and walk downstairs and use the potty in my bathroom?" In my sleepy stupor, that seemed like a possibility, so I got out of bed and walked into the bathroom and sure enough, no child.

I decided I must have been dreaming, giggled a little that I was dreaming about singing potty chairs, and I drifted back off to sleep.

3:30 a.m. I hear the royal trumpet fanfare. I bolt out of the bed, completely startled, kick the end of my bed as I round the corner, think bad words, lots and lots of bad words, and then once again see my dark empty bathroom. "I'm seriously losing it," I think to myself. "This potty training of twins is taking a toll on my mind."

4:42 a.m. The potty chair sings its third song, which is hard to describe, but it sounds like something they'd play when the queen enters the room . . . again, a "royal" noise.

At this point, I get out of bed, go into the bathroom, RIP the pieces of the potty chair apart because I don't know how else to make it stop singing, kick it for good measure just to show it who's boss, and go back to bed.

5:45 a.m. (I wish I was joking) I hear the fairy godmother wand waving noise, and I'm FREAKED OUT. I know I took that stupid thing apart and now it's SINGING AGAIN! What the . . .?

Turns out, Mike got up shortly after my 4:42 karate chopping round with the chair from hell, couldn't figure out why it was all torn to pieces, and so he put it back together! I think it waited an hour to sing again just to taunt me.

All that to say, I think my potty chair might be possessed. Or, I need a day off. Or both.