I was watching Grey's Anatomy (don't even think about judging me right now). On the show this week, there was a scene where Dr. Christina Yang went in to talk to Dr. Derek Shepherd.
She said, "You need to forgive Owen. You're holding a grudge."
Dr. Shepherd said, "I can't."
Dr. Yang said, "You need to."
Dr. Shepherd said, "It's hard."
Dr. Yang said, "I know. Do it anyway."
And of course, he forgave him.
But life is not a TV drama. That's not to say that life is not sometimes LIKE a TV drama. But in real life, things like forgiveness don't often happen in the course of an hour, wedged in between short commercial breaks.
In real life, forgiveness is often a process, a process that takes days, weeks, months, sometimes even years.
In real life, forgiveness comes with conversation, tears, prayer, and much soul searching.
And though I am wise enough to know that Grey's Anatomy is not real life, I like Dr. Yang's thoughts on forgiveness; "I know it's hard. Do it anyway." Just do it.
Someone said to me once (I think it might have been one of my sons), "Can you see yourself forgiving them years from now?" And when I said yes, they said, "Well then why not just forgive them now and save yourself the headache?"
The process of forgiveness might be a process, but the act of forgiveness comes in an instant. I think sometimes we just need to speed up the process and just get to it.
All that to say, life may not be a TV drama, but that doesn't mean we can't learn from it.
Good word, CJ. Good word. I needed to see that- especially the part about if you can see yourself forgiving them years from now... profound thoughts.
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