Ruled by Our Human Emotions - Happiness

Happiness is a  co-dependent emotion.  It is completely and totally dependant upon a right set of circumstances.  The right gift.  The right friendship.  The right marriage.  The right home.  The right job.  The right small group.  The right relationship with your kids.  The right car.

The list is endless.


Let one piece of our circumstances change and our happiness meter gets totally out of whack.

I even hear my little girls say, "I'm not happy."  

And when I inquire as to why, they say, "Btuz I want that doll," or "Btuz I want apple juice."

Even in their short-lived lives, they have learned that happiness, their happiness, is dependant upon getting what they want or what they think they need.

We, as adults, are equally conditioned to think that our happiness is dependant upon getting what we want or think we need.

But happiness is fleeting and fickle and self-serving. 

Joy, on the other hand, is completely different than happiness.  Joy is a contentment that defies the weighty gravity of conditional happiness.  It's an inner peace that passes all understanding.  It's a support structure for our spirit.  It props us up on really bad days, and it delights us and compels us forward on really good ones.

Joy is a gift that we are given.  A gift we must receive.  But sadly, we miss the precious, soul-feeding contentment of joy because we are so freaking caught up in worrying about our happiness.

All that to say, happiness is fleeting and self-serving.  Choose joy.

Just out of curiosity, what makes you happy, 

and what brings you joy?

All That to Say: A Strange Peace in the Midst of Surrender

Some months ago I heard a message about predestination (I'm a Christ Follower and I've provided a link if this is a new term for you), and I have to say that for the very first time it struck me in a profound way, a way that totally jacked up my prayer life.

I asked a lot of questions of my Pastor following that message; questions like, "So basically, God already knows every person who will either accept or reject His Son, Jesus.  Correct?"   His answer: Yes.  "God not only knows, but He has ORDAINED who will accept or reject His Son, Jesus.  Correct?"  His answer:  Yes.  "There's nothing I can say or do, or another person can say or do, that will cause someone to accept or reject Jesus, correct?"  Answer:  Yes.

"Then why does it matter if I tell someone about Jesus or not?" Answer: "Because God tells us to."

So the part that jacked up my prayer life was, "why should I pray if it is already figured out?!"

Prior to this message, I had a very rich prayer life, filled with lots of dialogue about pretty much everything.  And it went from that to nothing.  Because I suddenly felt like I didn't know how to pray, or worse yet that my prayers didn't matter.  And I have to confess to you that I didn't pray at all, for months. . . And then I lost my job.  Talk about a dialogue opener.

Over the course of the last few weeks since I left, I have noticed something about my prayers.  Most of my prayers were me trying to tell God how to be God.  I was constantly telling Him how I thought things should happen, how I thought they should have gone down, how I wanted things to change, what I needed, what He should do . . .  in short, I wanted to be in control.

And then I was struck with this thought; what if I just released my need to control and instead just focused on the majesty, the authority, the awesomeness of God?  What if I just surrendered to the idea that His plan was good and for my good, and quit trying to give Him a better plan?  What if I just worshiped Him, rejoicing each day in what He was doing in my life, what He was giving and what He was taking away?"

That's not to say that I don't still share my struggles, my hurts, my hopes and my fears with Him.  It's just that I'm not telling God what I think He should do.  I do still wake up most mornings asking, "Why?"  But the answer has quickly become, "Because this is what God has for my life.  This was His plan, and that's the only answer to "why?" that I need to remember."

All that to say, I'm sure that this will be a work in progress.  I'm a control freak.  But I have a strange peace in this place of surrender.  There's a lot of freedom in giving up control, which sounds like an oxymoron, but it's deep truth.

Day 78: Peace is Not a Place

I was visiting my long time friend and Pastor, Larry York, yesterday and he was sharing with me about his vacation in Wyoming and Montana.  It was fun to listen to him talk about trout-filled streams and giant ranger-protected elk, and log cabins and mountain views.

I went to see him because he is my Pastor, and the last few weeks of my life have been somewhat tumultuous, (and he's a wise counselor). Over the course of our conversation, I shared with him that mornings are the hardest for me because in those first few moments of waking I feel the turmoil.  My mind is still consumed by unanswered questions, and in the still quiet moments of dawn they demand an answer.

He showed me a picture on his cell phone (which was a little amusing to me because Larry will be the first person to tell you he is not technologically savvy).

The picture was of a majestic, snow-capped mountain, set behind a gorgeous lake all on the backdrop of a beautiful purple sky.  He asked me what I felt when I looked at that picture, and I said, "Peace."

He smiled and said that most people said that.  He said, "Imagine if you could wake up to that every morning.  Would you feel at peace?"  And of course I said that I would.  When he asked, "Why?"  I said it was because I could feel the presence of God.

He said that the same God who made those mountains made the trees outside my window, and the desert, and the valley.  He said, "It's not the mountain that is peaceful, it's God."

His point to me, and a great one, was to trust God and not my circumstances.  The peace I seek is in God, not in my location, nor in the answers I want, nor in my circumstances.

All that to say, Jesus said in John 14:27 "I am leaving you with a gift--peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don't be troubled or afraid." 

Jesus (and Larry), those are good words.  Thank you for the reminder.