Day 2: I Now Pronounce You

I don't know that I am a gifted enough writer to capture with words all that my heart and mind have taken in over the past few days.  My son, a boy that I gave birth to just a few short years ago, has become a man and taken a wife.  He is no longer mine, but hers.  A shift has taken place in the universe, one that will be imperceptible to most, but one that is dramatic and overwhelming and welcomed in mine.

There are truly no words to capture what it feels like to watch your son grow up and get married.  The days preceding the wedding were filled with wedding details, so I did not allow myself the luxury of deep introspection.  I simply had no time for it.  And the day of the wedding was equally filled with details, though I confess that once or twice I thought about the day, the wedding, their lives together, and I cried a few tears.  There was a moment when I was putting on my makeup, just hours before the ceremony, when I let a tear fall down my cheek, followed quickly by an unexpected sob.  There is a finality in a wedding ceremony.  Your children are commanded by God to leave their parents and cleave to one another.  That's pretty significant and quite frankly warrants a few tears on the part of the woman who carried and gave birth to those children.

I cried a few other times, but again, the moments that emotion welled up in me were silly and seemingly insignificant, but somehow were powerful.  I cried when I noticed that Zack's legs were shaking a little.  He was bouncing lightly on his heels.  And I smiled and then cried knowing that I might be the only person in the room to notice that my son was nervous.  And I cried when the Pastor said,  "Ladies and Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce to you for the very first time, Mr. and Mrs. Zachary Jones."  Silly place to cry.  But all of a sudden I thought, "What?  That sounds so strange and wonderful and weird all at the same time."

But beyond that, the rehearsal dinner and the wedding were absolutely incredible.  I was so proud of the toast my husband made at the rehearsal dinner.   (I'll mess this up, but trust me he was so eloquent) He said, "I remember when he (Zack) stood for the first time on his wobbly legs and started to walk across the floor and I wondered if he was ready, if he'd make it across the room. But he did.  And I remember when he tried to ride a bike and I wondered if he'd make it down the street.  And he did.  And I remember when he learned to drive a car and I wondered if he'd make it around the block.  And he did.  Because he was ready.  And he's ready now for this next step of his life." 

I wish I could recap every moment for you, but you would be bored, so I will spare you all of the details and give you my highlights.

Jacob gave the best "Best Man" toast I have ever heard.  His love for his brother was so apparent.  Their friendship throughout the years and his deep understanding for the man his brother had become made my heart leap.  Zack and Christina laughed (as did the audience) and they teared up (as did the audience) several times (especially over the fact that Christina called Jacob "Max" for quite a while when they first met.)  Truly one of my highlights.

My daughters walking down the aisle in their little princess dresses being the prettiest little flower girls I've ever seen (though I might be partial.)  Followed by Shortstack sitting promptly in my lap and then saying in a very disappointed voice, "Mommy, nobody clapped for me!"

My husband dancing the Cupid Shuffle.  (True story)

My dad and mom hitting the dance floor and being silly and just really having a great time! 

All of the six Jones's, and our newest family member, Christina Jones, all hitting the dance floor together to dance the first dance.  And to show you just how incredible it was, I went to get the girls (Nitro and Shortstack) to see if they wanted to dance, but they had just been served the wedding cake, so I thought it was a long shot.  As soon as I asked them if they wanted to dance, their cake was abandoned as they made a bee-line for the dance floor.  A highlight moment.

I laughed until I cried.  And then I cried.  Because I'm allowed.   I gave birth to the man that I saw stand on a stage and solemnly vow to take Christina Taylor to be his wife.  And in that moment he ceased to be mine.

And though the time that he was mine has been so special and overwhelmingly filled with love, my prayer is that it will be quickly eclipsed by the love he lavishes on her daily for the rest of their lives.

All that to say . . . (insert sigh here).