Happiness is a co-dependent emotion. It is completely and totally dependant upon a right set of circumstances. The right gift. The right friendship. The right marriage. The right home. The right job. The right small group. The right relationship with your kids. The right car.
The list is endless.
Let one piece of our circumstances change and our happiness meter gets totally out of whack.
I even hear my little girls say, "I'm not happy."
And when I inquire as to why, they say, "Btuz I want that doll," or "Btuz I want apple juice."
Even in their short-lived lives, they have learned that happiness, their happiness, is dependant upon getting what they want or what they think they need.
We, as adults, are equally conditioned to think that our happiness is dependant upon getting what we want or think we need.
But happiness is fleeting and fickle and self-serving.
Joy, on the other hand, is completely different than happiness. Joy is a contentment that defies the weighty gravity of conditional happiness. It's an inner peace that passes all understanding. It's a support structure for our spirit. It props us up on really bad days, and it delights us and compels us forward on really good ones.
Joy is a gift that we are given. A gift we must receive. But sadly, we miss the precious, soul-feeding contentment of joy because we are so freaking caught up in worrying about our happiness.
All that to say, happiness is fleeting and self-serving. Choose joy.
and what brings you joy?
Yes and my life is proof of the possibility of joy. Death of husband, Leukemia, unemployment, loss of relationship with daughter, mom with dementia. and other family issues. Just typing this could be depressing. But joy is possible. I just find I have to be intentional about choosing joy. It's much easier to have a pity party.. I'm also learning that each "negative" life experience has a positive aspect but it takes time and focus to find it.....and a whole lot of God's grace. Thanks, Carol. Great post!
ReplyDeleteWow Kay. You have many reasons to despair, so to say you choose joy is a powerful statement. I love your perspective that you are learning thate each "negative" life experience has a positive aspect but it takes time and focus to find it.
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